I'm keeping a log of day-to-day stuff on Google Docs. Tough because I'm a paper journal person...but my paper journals are just for me and a part of this UBBT journey is in the sharing. Keeping a digital journal makes me practice writing this way (I don't like it!) and the value is in the practice. Here's what I wrote this morning:
11/6 New ground for me- really understanding my current needs in nutrition and fueling my body like an athlete. So I did some math...my LEAST favorite thing. But forcing myself to look at the math is reality. I do believe in going by how I feel to gauge my fitness. I have to change my thinking on this some - First of all admitting that most of the reason I don’t dig too deeply into the numbers of my fitness is that I have a gap in knowledge and the math of it all intimidates me. (back to this: Do the work! Be HUMBLE enough to do the work. thx Kino) What I’m discovering is that I know more about it than I think, I’m just not confident about my knowledge because it takes me a minute to work through it. Perfection drives a wedge that really sucks. There is also the unknown...I've never been in this position. I've always needed to lose weight (got my Weight Watchers golden key ring at 12) and I know how to do that really well, I’m confident in my ability to help myself and others on that road. BUT- The things I know about nutrition are all filtered through that lens and it’s not really serving me any longer.
Through a different lens I see science, I want to work from facts not feelings. That said, if I set a goal of 13% body fat but FEEL like shit there I’ll respect that and re-evaluate. I’m shedding the mindset of not going by a number on the scale, but how my clothes feel or what I perceive when I look in the mirror. Letting go of the shape and form of my physical being and digging deep into function. There are many layers to work on here for me and even as I’m writing it out I’m laughing at my concern over the “math” which is just a roadblock that’s enabled my avoidance. Re-writing internal scripts is hard work. Again: (back to this: Do the work! Be HUMBLE enough to do the work. thx Kino) Uncomfortable as it is, I would rather have this annoying/awesome Kinovoice in my head and get on with the work than just repeating old scripts that no longer serve me.
THE NUMBERS: My lean body mass is 125 lbs. I want to maintain that and reduce my body fat by 2-3% by April. Right now it is 15.5% and the fancy math tells me that my body weight should drop from 148.8 to 143.7 to shed 5.1 lbs of body fat to arrive at my goal of 13%.
CURRENT GOAL: Get at least 125 grams of lean protein a day. I’m just going to start with that. Workouts are going great and I’m happy with the progress I’m seeing in strength and mobility.
